Diversity

Cole and I recently decided that we were going to take on a 31 day prayer challenge for our children. I found a calendar on Pinterest to guide us through the 31 days of prayer and we are working through it. So today, the theme for prayer was "diversity." I studied and prayed over Galatians 3:28 to go along with this theme.

²⁸ There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.

As I read and prayed over the scripture for the boys, I was struck by the significance that I felt while reading and praying. I can honestly say that I have never prayed for diversity for the boys. I pray that they will know Jesus, that they will be protected, that they will be feel loved, accepted and safe. I pray for their future spouses, big decisions they will make, and careers..but diversity? Never! Then, the reality of our current situation sunk in. We are in nothing if not a diverse situation right now. Everywhere we look there are people who look, sound, and talk different than we do. Of course this is true throughout the city, but it is particularly true for us at church. There are people from all over the world who attend ICCG. People come from all different cultures, speak many different languages, have different accents and colors. Thinking and praying through this this morning really moved me.

Diversity is not something that I am really too familiar with. I grew up in a small town where most people and families seemed the same (at least from the outside looking in). For the most part, we all went to similar churches, thought in similar ways about things, and went to the same high school. A lot of people stay in or around the town where I grew up. FYI...I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing, but it doesn't do much for finding diversity either. The same is true for my college experience. I went to a small christian university where, again, it was not really that diverse. Of course there was more diversity than where I grew up, but there wasn't much that was earth shattering, and it was very easy to find people similar to me. After Cole and I got married, we moved to England for a short expat assignment. That assignment was VERY hard for me! People and things were very different than what I was used to. Instead of trying to embrace our situation, I became very closed off. I didn't do much to try to get involved in our community. We found a little church that we attended while we were there, but we didn't really get to know people or try to engage. When we left to go back home, we didn't feel like we were leaving anyone or anything because we hadn't given ourselves really at all. I'm ashamed to say that I can't even remember the name of the church or any of the people we met while we were there. When we returned back to the U.S. and moved south, we immediately began looking for people who were similar to us in thinking and lifestyle. It was easy to find that and we eventually found ourselves very comfortable in the midst of a great church and small group.

In my opinion, that in and of itself is not necessarily bad, but it's very easy. It's easy to gravitate towards people who are similar to you. Who live like you and think like you. Who look like you and talk like you. It's very easy to do that. In fact, we have even found ourselves drawn to other Americans that we have found here. It's easy! The danger in that is that it's also very easy to look down on or brush off those who are different than you. I am amazed at how God has changed my view of this in the short time we have been in Gent. We have been so incredibly blessed by people who are very different from us. We have been loved and embraced by the people at International Community Church Gent (ICCG) and are constantly in awe of how God has been working through this adventure here.

If I'm being honest, it was hard for me to want to attend ICCG when we first arrived. It's different than what I'm used to and different can make me uncomfortable. But despite our differences...our cultures, our languages, our heritage, how we grew up, how we're used to worshipping, etc., we are all connected eternally through Jesus Christ. And we worship together. Despite our differences, we find a way to put aside our selfish desires of what we're used to or want to come together and worship the One who is greater than all of that. The diversity that we have found here has opened my eyes to so much of the selfishness in my own heart and mind when thinking about church and what our purpose is in the church. It's helped me work through my issues about attending a church that is so different than what I'm used to. It's helped me be able to worship alongside a fellow believer, even if we don't agree on every issue that we (as people) choose to argue about...politics, music, marriage, traditional church, relevant church, etc. When we make church about anything more than the gospel, we are spoiling it and making our desires more important than the gospel.

I am so thankful that God has placed this on my heart and is working to change how I feel about embracing and worshipping with people who are different than me. I'm also thankful that the boys have a chance to witness, first hand, how people can love each other and worship together, despite differences that might arise. You can bet that I am going to add diversity to my prayer list for the boys. I can see how important it is to be able to see past our differences and look to the fact that we are a body of believers connected through Jesus Christ. I hope that, with God's grace, Cole and I can be a good example of this for the boys. They need to be able to see what's truly important. Thankfully, we will have lots of opportunities to practice this as a family with church, school, and everyday life!

Meet the Teacher

Today we had the chance to go to Cameron's school to meet his teacher, other staff at the school, and other parents and children. It was also a chance for the kids to get comfortable with their surroundings before school starts on September 2nd. As you might recall from this post, sending Cameron to school was a process...especially for me! I was nervous about today. For so long, I have been someone who has watched other people send their kids to school, meet teachers, etc. Anyways, so Cole, Cameron and I went to the school today for the open house. Here are some pictures from today...

Such a special little boy

Getting ready to leave for the school

Cameron really enjoyed playing with the toys and meeting some of his classmates!

Giant touch screen TV. Cameron liked painting.

A map showing where Cameron and his classmates are from. 

It was nice, and reassuring, to visit the school and feel like we know what Cameron will be doing during the day and who he will be with. We were also able to meet several of the parents as well as Cameron's teacher. By the time we left, I was excited for this opportunity for Cameron. I think he is going to love going to school and thrive there. I am also excited for the little friends Cameron will be able to meet at the school. 

After the open house, Cameron and I took some time together to go get a little treat from the bakery to celebrate this big day for him! I am really going to miss spending my days with him!

I know Cameron is excited to start school and, for the most part, Cole and I are to. Monday is going to be hard for all of us, but I am looking forward to seeing what's in store for Cameron (and us) as we start this new adventure!

This is Different...Part 2

You can check out my last post about the differences between here and the U.S. to see my initial thoughts about living in Belgium. However, as we continue to adapt to living overseas, we continue to find things that are simply just different than what we're used to. I feel like I should, again, point out that these things are not necessarily bad, but just different. So here are some new observations...

Speedos...everywhere...enough said!

Touching/Personal space: It has been pointed out to me on several occasions since I've been here that Americans like their personal space. Although I certainly don't represent all Americans, I can't really argue with that statement. I like to have my space and start to feel uncomfortable when people pass the personal space bubble that I've set for myself. Of course everyone defines personal space differently, but you get the point, I don't like people super close to me...especially when I am talking to someone. I remember the first time I was totally freaked out by this after we arrived in Belgium. We were getting ready to leave church one Sunday evening a few weeks after we arrived and one of our new (male) friends here leaned in to give me a kiss on the cheek to say goodbye. That is a totally normal way for friends and acquaintances to said hello or goodbye to one another, but I was completely thrown off by it. I'm sure he thought I was crazy because my first response when he started coming so close was to throw my hands up and jump back! I tried to casually recover and act calm, but I'm pretty sure I acted like a complete weirdo. He has since greeted me that way and I still jump back and go into defense mode! I hope to get better at this.

Maybe I should preface this next part by saying that, in America, we are constantly inundated with stories about children being abducted, hurt, abused, etc. and how much we need to protect them, so I am probably a little more sensitive to this than some. The other way that I have really seen this personal space/touch manifested is with the boys. I have never been so uncomfortable with the amount of touching, talking to, and interacting with the boys by complete strangers as I have been here. Here are just two of many examples of situations where mama bear wanted to jump out and attack strangers who were, in my opinion, being inappropriate with the boys. The first example happened when we were at the registration office here in Gent trying to get our residency cards. We all had to be there to get the process started, so we were waiting in the line with boys, minding our own business, when a man walked past us and rubbed his hand along Cameron's head and cheek before moving on. Cole and I looked at each other, completely shocked, and both asked if that man had just touched our child?! He's lucky it happened so fast and then moved on because we were both ready to jump in and protect our child!! The other incident happened when we were in Paris. We were sitting at a restaurant eating lunch when the hostess of the restaurant came up to the table and tried to get Harrison out of the stroller to hold him?! She didn't speak English and I don't speak French, so I, as calmly as I could, pulled Harrison back down and held him in his seat in the stroller. I guess she got the hint because she left, but I was, once again, shocked. There are many more stories like those, but I am constantly amazed and the amount of freedom people have with the boys. From holding them to touching them to giving them food or drinks...especially without asking us if we're ok with what's going on. It's very different than what I'm used to.

Church: I haven't decided whether or not to wade into the current discussions and debates about church that have been floating around in America, but God has definitely been working in my heart in this area since we have been here. One of the biggest things that has stood out to me since being here is that church is not a commodity. There is not a church on every street corner. There are not Christians everywhere you look. It's very different. I am so thankful for the church community that God has provided for us while we're here, but also for the ways in which God has worked in my heart to change the way I think about church and the purpose of the church. Maybe I'll share more specific thoughts about this at another time...

Air Conditioning: There is none! At least not in the homes in Gent. There are some stores and businesses that have air conditioning, but in the home, it's pretty much non-existent. For the most part, air conditioning is not really necessary because the weather during the summer is pretty mild except for a few days here and there. I realize this is a pretty inane issue and that we are very blessed to have access to air conditioning like we do in the U.S., but it's still a difference. I am used to being very comfortable in the home. I'm not used to sweating like crazy while cooking dinner or trying to sleep. Cole even slept outside in the rain one night because it was so hot and humid in our loft! There really have only been a few days where we were pretty miserable. The sunshine and warmth is such a welcomed sight here because it's usually gray and rainy, so I hate to complain. But again, it's just different!

Vacation: In America, vacation is something that we hold onto very tightly and use sparingly. A week of vacation in the U.S. is sometimes seen by some as excessive, and it's really uncommon to take more than one week off at a time. I knew coming here that the work ethic was different, but I was shocked to learn that a lot of companies, stores, and businesses, including the one Cole works for, actually close their doors completely for three weeks or so in July or August for people to go on vacation. In fact, Cole was told by someone in HR that he really needed to try to take off at least two weeks in a row! He didn't do it...maybe the American way of thinking about work was too ingrained in his mind to allow him to give in and take the time?! I think it would be nice to take a vacation like that, but it would also be a little weird, even for me...and I LOVE vacation! Cole did take a week off and we really enjoyed our time with him here!

Customer Service: In America, we are used to "customer satisfaction guaranteed" in pretty much every aspect of our lives. We can buy, exchange, return, and pretty much demand that something be as perfect as we desire, order, etc. It's nice to know that you will almost always get what you are looking for or need, but it can also create a sense of entitlement if you're not careful. Here, customer satisfaction is not guaranteed. You cannot return something that you have purchased and get a refund. You can take it back and perhaps get a credit at the store to get something else, but there is no such thing as getting a refund. And there is no such thing as a 90 day grace period before you can return or exchange. Here, it's 14 days at the most. You might have read about our little incident with the cake for Cameron's birthday party. We definitely were not satisfied with the cake we received compared to the cake we ordered, especially because it was an expensive cake. When I inquired about getting a refund, I was offered a much smaller cake to make up for the inconvenience that was caused. I didn't need or want another cake because one, that did not even come close to covering the expense of the other cake, and two, I didn't need a cake since the party was already over. When I discussed this with them, I was told that they didn't make the cakes in house and therefore, were not responsible for the issues. After a little more communication, I was finally offered a 10% discount off my next cake order from their bakery. I'm not going to pursue this issue any further, but this is definitely a difference that I have had to get used to. I try really hard not to be pushy and appear entitled...Americans already have a reputation for that, so I am trying to learn to just go with it and accept that this is something that is going to be different here.

Even though there continue to be things that are different in Belgium, I can still honestly say that we are enjoying our time here. God is faithful in teaching us and helping us through difficult and new things...and we are even able to laugh at a lot of our crazy experiences! We are working on embracing as many of the changes as we can and not wish for things to change...ok, maybe not the speedos! We don't want to miss out on our time here because we were wishing for things to be like they are in the U.S. I'm sure there will be a part 3 to this series at some point, but until then, we will work to enjoy the blessings we have received!

Family Day at Puyenbroeck

This past weekend we took advantage of the beautiful weather and spent the day at a nearby park called Puyenbroeck. It was a much needed family day after being so busy with visitors over the past few weeks. It was nice to spend a relaxing day having fun and enjoying each other and the weather. As a side note, there are parks all over the place here. There are smaller parks all throughout the city, with larger parks here and there as well. The large parks are awesome because they are subsidized by the Belgian government. Therefore, they are really nice and free, or very affordable to enjoy. We have really enjoyed this little perk of being here. I thought I would share some pictures from our day.

We started our day with a train ride through the park. The boys loved riding this train!

After the train ride, we ate lunch at a little restaurant in the park. The restaurant was complete with an excavator and indoor playground!

After lunch, we enjoyed a paddle boat ride

The closest I could get to a picture of the four of us

Cameron was in charge of steering the boat

Just chillin'

Next, we took a nice hour long bike ride through the park. Cameron LOVED his little bike!

We stopped at a little play area during our ride for a water break and some fun.

Before we left for the day, we let the boys get out every last ounce of energy they had left in their little bodies at the huge playground.

There is so much more to do at this park that we just didn't have time for like miniature golf, swimming, a recreational/sports area, some kind of go kart type area, a ropes course, an animal park, a flower garden, and camping to name a few. I almost convinced myself that it would be fun to go camping there sometime...almost. For those of you who know me, you know how big of a step that would be for me! :) Anyways, we had such a wonderful day and we can't wait to go back again, hopefully soon!

Gentse Feesten (Gent Festival)

Last week (July 20-29) there was a huge event here in Gent called the Gentse Feesten (Gent Festival). Here is quick snippet from the official website describing what Gentse Feesten is all about (www.gentsefeesten.be).

After almost 170 years, the Ghent Festivities have developed into one of the largest cultural festivals in Europe. During ten days, six international festivals are organized; there is cost-free music on 10 squares, animation for children in various locations in the city and hundreds of indoor and outdoor activities. The overall surface of the Festivities area amounts to 765.000 m2.

It is not possible to formulate an unequivocal profile for the Ghent Festivities. This festival is both an urban festival, a cultural event and a large-scale popular feast.

Since their origin in 1843, the Ghent Festivities have always been free of charge, which makes it approachable for a large audience, also owing to its diversity. In the past years, the number of visitors increased form 1.2 million to +/- 1.7 million, with a number of visitors of over 100.000 people every day.

There is a considerable fluctuation of one location to the other. There are common atmosphere seekers and there are target-oriented visitors.

Basically, it's a huge party all over the city. Thousands and thousands of people come to listen to music, dance, eat, drink, and party day and night. We were nervous about the festival because we get very mixed reviews from the locals we know. A few people said it was fun and that there would be many things for us to do with the boys. However, most people told us that it was a drunken mess and that they usually leave the city for some, if not all, of the festival. So we had no idea what to expect. Thankfully, we live just far enough from where most of the events were that we really weren't too affected by it. If we wanted to enjoy the festivities, we could walk over and participate. If not, we could stay on this side of town and remain pretty normal. Other than the crazy amount of people here, the only other inconvenience was the increased amount of drunken kids walking past our loft at 3:00 am. Even though we were dealing with the stomach bug during some of the festival, we were able to get out a couple nights and enjoy some music, food, dancing, and fun for the boys. Here are a few pictures.

Looking at the firetrucks

Looking at a stage over the water

The main stage

Dancing at the main stage

Watching the fireworks commemorating the Belgian independence day from our loft

The boys had a great time at the free children's play area near our house! 

 

Random body piercing stand in the middle of a square??

Enjoying a concert

The festival officially ended on Monday of this past week, but there were still people out and about at one of the main squares drinking and carrying on well into Tuesday. Cole went to check it out on his lunch break on Tuesday and said that the police and trash trucks were basically sitting there waiting for the people to finally leave so they could pack and clean things up. People really have a good time! :)

So overall, we don't feel like Gentse Feesten was a drag on our week. In fact, we are looking to next year so we can do more exploring and enjoying.